Dear Sheng,
I know it's hard and only a fool will tell you that it's easy but try to keep going and remain strong for the baby.
I've been busy these past few months and we haven't been in touch. I don't actually know what happened but reading from your blog entries, I gather that you've been through a lot since the start of the year.
I'm sorry if I was not able to help or even lend my shoulder for you to cry on. I hope I was able to give you advices at that time and now, I'm wonderin' if things would have been different if you heard my stories and POV.
I had my share of heartaches and had my heart broken too before but at the time when my life seems bleak, I trusted God and believed His plans. Betrayal is hard to accept and forgiving is easier said than done but by having my faith in God, I was able to move on.
The best advice I received during that time was from my friend Joesel. She said "She, bisan ano mo kapilit kung hindi para kanimo, hindi guid ra. Bisan ano mo kalagyo, kung kamo guid, kamo guid. Ang importante gin-obra mo tanan nga pwede mo maobra, kung wara, te basi hindi guid man tana ang para kanimo." (She, no matter how you try if it's not for you, it's not. No matter how you run away, if you're meant to be, then you're meant to be. What's important is that you did everything you can but if nothing came out of it, maybe he's not really the one for you.)
Be strong Sis. Focus on your baby and the future. You're right, whether or not you're ready for the responsibility, you have no choice but to be. Try to be healthy during your pregnancy. Eat more fruits and veggies and drink plenty of water and milk. Avoid sweets, avoid soda. Try walking and other low impact exercises after the 1st trimester to avoid edema (with your doctor's advice).
Love and light sis, Godspeed!
SR
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